|“||Life needed a bit of madness. Why should death be any different?||”|
—Wilford to Abe
Wilford Warfstache is Markiplier's most well-known “alter ego” and representative of his channel (even though technically he’s his own separate person). Wilford Warfstache is an avid journalist/news reporter for the AFC News and, now, for his own talk show WARFSTACHE Tonight! He was formerly known as the Colonel or William J. Barnum and was a childhood friend of Damian (the former Mayor), Mark, and Celine.
Wilford Warfstache is a man who looks and sounds much like Mark himself, recognized for his distinctive pink mustache, unbelievable amount of class and amusing voice. He makes his debut appearance in Mark's first sketch comedy video The Fall of Slender Man as a news presenter who interviews the Slender Man (who had gone into hiding following a series of events) about his personal life, accusing him of child-molesting and heroin addiction. To Warfstache, he is also known to have a big 'D'.
Warfstache is known for his astounding class and bravado. His most distinctive feature is his bushy pink mustache, which almost immediately became an icon of Mark's community. It is also implied that he is exceptionally strong, as mentioned in The Fall of Slender Man, where he recounts an event in which the Slender Man was horribly beaten by himself, alongside Mark and others (possibly referring to other YouTubers) during his time in prison, with Warfstache stating that he "punched Slender Man in the gonads (testicles)" (this display was also demonstrated at the end of the Slender Man Song, where he downs the Slender Man with one punch to the gonads).
The majority of Warfstache's appearances depict him as a news reporter for different newscasts - during his debut, he worked as a journalist for the AFC News, and continued to work for them until his most recent interview, where he is seen to be operating under his own title. This suggests that his job as a reliable news reporter had brought him a large amount of success, enough to start his own talk show. It is expected by some fans that he may later appear as a Nicaraguan-trained surgeon (similar to Dr. Iplier).
Warfstache used to be known as William J. Barnum or "The Colonel" (whom he preferred to be called by his friends), who showed similar traits and attributes as the current Warfstache. He was originally a successful safari hunter, though evidence shows that he was slowly becoming more paranoid and losing his grip on his sanity as the years went on. In the aftermath of Mark’s poker party, however, it all came to a head when he shot the Detective in a fit of rage and accidentally killed the District Attorney seconds after. The guilt of what he’d done and losing his two dearest friends; Celine and Damien, was too much for him to bear. Sitting by the District Attorney’s body for the rest of the night, William held Damien’s cane, mourning the loss of his friends and regretting his actions. The last of the Colonel’s sanity shattered indefinitely, driving him completely insane from the trauma, when he watched the body of the District Attorney suddenly just get back up (via the possession of Damien, Celine and the Entity within the Manor) and became convinced that every murder he committed afterwards was simply a game, that death held no meaning, and everyone would simply just wake up. He was even convinced that the others were playing the game on him as a cruel joke. Seconds later, in a state of hysteric madness he went in search of Celine and Damien, believing them to be alive as well.
At some point afterwards, William changed his name to Wilford Warfstache, completely forgetting the life he lived before and dying his mustache pink, the suspenders he wears faded from red to light pink due to their age.
Several years after the events of Who Killed Markiplier? but still retaining a piece of his sanity, William has been running from the Detective ever since the "murders" of Mark, Damien, Celine, and the District Attorney. He has gone through several different personas, but all center around his eccentrics and has been found by his current identity: Wilford "Motherloving" Warfstache, a dancer with a pink afro and themes from the 70s.
He is found by the Detective in a dance club and (while defying the laws of physics/nature) is captured and brought back to the Detective's office for questioning. There he finally remembers Abe and asks how he's been doing after all these years and continues to defy the laws of reality due to his time inside the Manor (Upside Down) and explains that he is sorry for what he did and continues to tell Abe facts from the past and future, which breaks the Detective's understanding, and tells him to not focus on the little details and how he should just go with the flow, to which Abe decides to join him in the dancing and ignore the reality bending.
In his debut, Wilford Warfstache worked as an avid journalist for the AFC News. He had recently gotten the chance to interview the elusive Slender Man after finding him strolling through a pasture, clad in a poor disguise. The interview began with both secluded in a small room. After removing the disguise, the Slender Man was ready to disclose information of his recent doings to Warfstache, detailing his trip to the woods and his attempts to paint, his locking up in an asylum, his eventual freedom and aspiration to become a teacher, his return home to find his house robbed, his move to the city, and his eventual surrender and lock-up in a prison. All of these events, the Slender Man claims, transpired because of one Markiplier - he had ripped his paintings from the trees in the forest, found him in the asylum alongside many other individuals, stolen his lesson plans (which Warfstache assumes to be because of his history with children), robbed his house (and took, of all things, his grandfather clock), found him in the city and later joined Warfstache in beating him "to a pulp" in prison. Throughout the interview, Wilford Warfstache expresses nothing but admiration for Markiplier, to the disdain of the Slender Man. When asked about what happened next, the Slender Man give details on his trip to Jamaica and how his life was turned around when he met "a couple of nice fellows", which is where Warfstache speculates is what started his addiction to heroin, to which the Slender Man denies before the interview ends.
After Mark's many failures in the forest, Warfstache is alerted to the Slender Man's new hideout and seeks to interview him once more about his heroin addiction and child-molestation. As he ventures the woods, he comes across scraps of the Slender Man's diary, each page giving insight into the Slender Man's inner thoughts about Markiplier, which reveal that he expresses a deep and disturbing love for him despite his outwardly attitude towards him, as well as his hatred for Warfstache. Warfstache, finding an overwhelming interest in these pages, continues onward to collect more while simultaneously searching for the Slender Man to conduct his interview. After finding several diary entries, the Slender Man, furious over his secrets being revealed to the world, attempts to kill Warfstache. Blissfully unaware of the obvious danger, Warfstache once again asks about his heroin addiction, to which he receives no reply.
Wilford Warfstache appears at the end of the video, charging into frame whilst holding a dog and with his fist outstretched, punching the Slender Man so hard in the gonads that he becomes incapacitated, to the confusion of Mark.
The events of The Warfstache Affair took place around mid-afternoon on June 12, 2013. Journalist Wilford Warfstache became the convicted killer of three people (a wife and husband and their neighbor), a dog, and (supposedly) a baby. The murder weapon was a six-shot, fully loaded Dan Wesson 8" revolver
On the day of the murder, Warfstache was engaged in an affair with the wife on the day of her anniversary. The husband had arrived home and made his way to his room to surprise his wife on their anniversary. As he approached the room, he witnessed his wife engaged in an steamy affair with convict Wilford Warfstache. Upon threatening to kill both the wife and Warfstache, Warfstache drew his revolver in an act of self-defense. There was a moment's pause before he fired the first shot. The husband was struck and his body hit the ground. His last words were "you are done". The wife was left in shock. She was about to inform the police of the accident. Fearing for his life, Warfstache fired the second shot, entering the side and killing the wife. The neighbor entered the room just after and in a self-induced state of shock, Warfstache fired the third shot, killing the neighbor.
Terrified of the events that unfurled, Warfstache then sees the family dog. Upon realizing that a witness remained, he fired upon the dog. Outside the house, the sound of the family's baby rang out, before another gunshot was heard. It was assumed that Warfstache had killed the baby as well, although the body was never discovered. The house was soon burned down after the event.
Shortly after returning from Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, Officer Ned comes together with Officer Lee and they discuss the prior situation with Warfstache. Ned affirms that the case is considered personal for him, and that he would not stop until Warfstache was caught.
After finding the assumed hideout of Wilford Warfstache, the two officers storm the area, but find the main room empty. After careful inspection, Ned hears "sweet, sassy music" coming from one of the smaller offshoot rooms. Both officers investigate, and find Warfstache grooving with his back to the doorway. Entranced by the music, Ned starts dancing with his uniform off. Lee, baffled, questions Ned's actions, which he tries to justify, only to catch the attention of Warfstache, who fires a shot from a concealed, gold plated, pearl handled double-barreled over and under derringer, hitting Ned in the right hip. Lee attempts to assist Ned by firing back at Warfstache, but his gun has a pink plastic bag covering it, preventing him from shooting. Warfstache looks at the cop's gun in confusion before running out of the room. Both engage in a lengthy chase through the building which brings them to the rooftop. Cornered, both Warfstache and Lee engage in a firefight. Ned, hearing gunshots being fired, struggles to stand up before hobbling over to catch up with Lee.
The firefight continues on the rooftop between Lee and Warfstache, eventually resulting in Lee receiving severe injuries. Ned arrives too late, and starts to mourn over his partner's body before Warfstache approaches him, gun pointed at the back of his head. As he asks where it all went wrong, Warfstache gets shot from afar by the family's baby from the incident. As Ned is about to express his gratitude, he accidentally shoots the baby with Warfstache's pistol.
Warfstache makes an appearance, playing the remainder of the Amnesia custom story in place of Markiplier (though this is due to Mark expressing a need to wear his custom moustache because "[he] wanted to"). In this episode, Warfstache's moustache is considerably larger (due to it being a gift sent in the mail by a fan), and is seen bearing a smaller black moustache attached to his wide-rimmed glasses.
Wilford Warfstache once again appears for another interview, this time working as a senior reporter and operating under his own show (titled WARFSTACHE Tonight!). After introducing himself, he reveals that he managed to get in touch with Freddy Fazbear's Pizza's very own Phone Guy for an interview about how the place operates. Aside from the poor communication at the beginning of the interview (during which Warfstache lost his cool due to the Phone Guy's repetitious "hello"s), the interview runs extremely well, with the Phone Guy giving insight on what one would do when working as a night guard at the establishment. During the interview, Warfstache shows extreme astonishment at the many unusual skills needed and the amount of "boo!"s one would experience when working at Freddy's.
Later, as Warfstache attempts to learn more of the odd conspiracies and mysteries surrounding the history of the restaurant, the power cuts out within the building, leaving him and the Phone Guy in the dark. Warfstache gets up to investigate the problem, leaving the Phone Guy in the room, all the while rambling about the poor quality of his coworkers' management. As he treks the hallways, candle in hand, he hears the distant bellowing laughter of Freddy. Reiterating his identity as Wilford Warfstache, he turns around, coming face-to-face with a pair of glowing red eyes, shortly before his candle blows out and Golden Freddy lunges at him, screaming.
Wilford appears as the creator of his rate-boosting project, where he makes appearances in the sixth clip at the bottom right corner. He also appears in the ninth clip as the game show host that shoots the contestant he refers to as "the big man in the stupid vest" after the contestant guessed the answer as "do it do it do it come on kill me i'm here come on do it now kill me" which obviously causes an uproar, as well as the twelfth clip where he attempts to push away his name, the thirteenth clip where he blows bubbles as a solution to the ghosts of his murder victims due to himself being the problem where "it wasn't just a misunderstanding where you were trying to tickle them with a knife," and in the final fifteenth clip where he scat sings about killing Santa Claus and sleeping with "Jerry's" wife. In the final scene, Wilford is revealed to be the creator of Markiplier TV, and he gathers opinions from the other Markiplier alter egos, who think that it's completely stupid and . These personas include, in speaking order:
- Ed Edgar
- Bim Trimmer
- Silver Shephard
- Dr. Iplier
- "The Host"
- King of the Squirrels, and
- Septiplier, who Wilford ends up killing.
- Wilford appears in LixianTV's second animated Markiplier short, but his name is misspelled "Wilfred." This is a common mistake made by many of the fanbase.
- He appears in many live action videos as both the main protagonist and antagonist.
- Warfstache's origins date back to The Fall of Slender Man's production - Mark, wanting to add to the skit, found and threw on a random pink mustache and started talking in a weird voice (imitating examples of news people in the past, as well as to "keep the mustache from falling off"). This addition eventually birthed the concept of a new alter ego (Wilford Warfstache).
- During The Bloopers of Slender Man, it is implied that Warfstache was not the first choice of name for the character - Warfstache is named "Warfsum" by Mark, but whether it is a placeholder name or Mark just mumbling the name "Warfstache" is up to the viewer.
- According to Mark during his Slaps-Giving | Donations For Slaps live stream, Warfstache was a war veteran sometime in the past.
- Warfstache has his own character in the Markiplier Mod for Don't Starve. He is unlocked by unlocking the Blacksmith's Chest after killing the Hooded Hero.
- As of September 11, 2015, Warfstache has interviewed three subjects on-screen: the Slender Man, the Phone Guy, and Mark himself. Of the three, Mark is the only one to be an actual person.
- When Mark played Markiplier The Game, he became confused and questioned what a "Warfstache" was when it was mentioned, which questions how the name came into effect.